Sir Mix-a-lot: ಠ_ಠ

It’s supposedly for convenience. More for the people charging me than me, but convenient nonetheless.

Strangely wholesome.

“he’s here…”

Sooo… Early Myspace?

I struggled in school despite being smart. I was tested but they said I didn’t have it.

Then as an adult, I re-tested. They updated the things they look for and are more aware of how people can try to mask and deal with their symptoms, which in the past made it difficult to diagnose. I was diagnosed then.

At first, very hard.

I left an abusive relationship. I was afraid for my life. He made it clear that I should have been scared though, after some incidents incited by him.

He financially abused me and I had nearly nothing to my name. I took care of our daughter myself. He fought for custody of her. I fought back, and got sole custody.

I would get “anonymous” CPS reports filed against me. It was always nerve-wracking, but nothing was ever substantiated.

He still continues to try to get access to my medical records, to find something to use against me. It has been a decade now.

He still finds ways to mess with me via supervised visitation. (They allow him to break the rules.) I have to brush it off and endure it. Nothing more can be done. I was hoping he would lose interest but he has not.

He had to go to a batterer’s intervention class. Based on the court reports, he has not accepted any responsibility for what he has done. He has, however, gotten new vocabulary to weaponize against me and claims that I was abusive. (The incidents in question include me telling him to stop spending money on himself so I could pay rent. Apparently that is “financial abuse” and I “had all the power in the relationship because I made all the money” when he refused to work, but was able to.)

He is tens of thousands of dollars behind on child support. Every time I try to get court to enforce it, he brings me back to court. It costs me a lot of money so it is cheaper to not even try. (He affords it by having his dad pay for it. He doesn’t even pay for the lawyer himself. I, however, pay for my own lawyer.) Every time we tried to garnish his wages, he would quit his job.

I have to be very careful with how I live my life because he tried to find me doing anything out of line to take me back to court. If I lose and he gets unsupervised access, he will harm our child. I am afraid of what will happen when I no longer have a restraining order to protect me, but at least I am an adult that can protect myself. (The restraining order has already helped me a few times…)

It is exhausting.

However, life is so much better now. I worked hard and it paid off. I don’t have a leech spending all of our money on video games while I bring in all the money, do a lot of the household duties, and take care of a minor child. I don’t have to worry about my bank account having much less money and not being able to pay bills, because my partner saw something they wanted. I don’t have to fear my own safety in my home. I don’t have to shove all of my feelings down or else be belittled. I don’t have to be held back and sabotaged, because me achieving something hurts my partner’s feelings. I can have friends again without him inserting himself into the friendship or cutting them off from me.

It is much better.

I didn’t really have a bully, but no one really liked me all that much. A combination of not being likable (home problems), neurodivergent, and a minority.

I looked up one of the guys that was a jerk and apparently he’s a cop now. That tracks. The rest I really don’t remember and honestly I just don’t care that much.

If you don’t want downvotes, you may find yourself happier on an instance that does not enable downvotes.

I am so sorry that happened to you. You remember the term “fight or flight” response? They have added “freeze” to the mix.

I don’t know if you need to hear this, but your reaction was normal and it doesn’t mean you deserved it. It sounds like you’re trying to reclaim your autonomy in response to something traumatic, and that’s ok. Sorry someone tried to make you feel shitty for it.

A Christmas Story

I have never been able to watch the whole thing. Ralphie’s whining and dull life was just unpleasant. I didn’t really like any of the characters. Nothing in it was entertaining except for the kid and the pole. It was just a slog. I think the furthest I ever got was at a scene about a parade?

It seems like this is a really popular movie but I just never saw the appeal.

I was looking for this answer.

I tend to like these “slow” types of movies, like Napoleon Dynamite. Maybe it’s because I find the characters unrelatable I don’t like it? I was honestly waiting for the good part, but every part that was even mildly interesting, I just… Didn’t care about any of the characters and didn’t care about whatever was happening.

For anyone considering this, check your zoning laws. Years ago, to save money, I wanted to buy some land and put a trailer on it so I could save up to build something more permanent.

The laws did not permit that. Nor living in an RV. Or living in your car. We had to fight to get tiny houses here IIRC, but the cost savings for those isn’t as big as I would have hoped. (And being disabled, being able to do a lot of the work to save money wasn’t an available option.)

I mean, I have no qualms with recognizing the US education system is garbage… It gives me more fire to try to improve it.

No way, me too

Helped me, so all was not lost. :)

It’s six times better than vine!

Childhood memor-knees

Yep, I have a successful career and had… Ehh ok grades and I graduated college and everything.

The problem was I was basically in overdrive all the time and miserable just to get everything done.

I finally got a diagnosis. It’s a lot easier than in the past. They tested me years ago and basically said I am very intelligent I’m just lazy.

Getting meds has been a challenge though. Not sure when that will happen for me…

Moisannaite gives the most rainbows, and I think they are gorgeous.

But I do love the sparkle of diamonds, and sometimes prefer it. Fortunately synthetic ones are easy to come by.