I want to understand, intrinsically, and be able to manipulate to my liking, all the financial systems of the world.

At worst, I’d quickly become a well-paid accountant. At best, I’d become an extremely talented, untraceable, modern Robin Hood.

I was thinking of that guy who raped her multiple times and had HIV. I really need that guy to have more than “some time to think about what you’ve done” because he’d probably jerk off to it. :(

Normally I’m 100% for this, it’s just that this particular case seems so evil and egregious…

Is it? You didn’t use any.

She wouldn’t let the fisherman look in her wooden box, so they came up with this while story about her being a foreign princess, married for convenience, and took an illicit lover, so they killed her lover and put his head in the box and set her to sea.

That is an insane amount of bananas details for “she has a box and won’t let us see what’s inside.”

Fuck I want a cigarette now.

I am absolutely the bunny. Because I’m moisturized and just had my hair done, but I’m also completely done.

Binged (the search engine) and binged (the eating disorder/content consumption method) look identical and this fucks me up.

I got a warning on an ADHD sub reddit for posting too much.

It’s the biggest reason I stopped making memes.

Appreciate it but your comment got auto corrected on two instances of “causal” to “casual” by commie.

The last time my boyfriend heard “colder than a witch’s tit” he reached over and touched my boob ans said, “Well they feel pretty warm to me so you need a better system of measurement.”

I’m probably gonna marry him.

Downright folksy.

What on earth is a snack bucket?