Hey man, you don’t have to hold the world up by itself. Not everything is your responsibility. In fact a lot of what people are saying here that are causing these spikes are a result of isolation and society failing our people. All out individualism isn’t that great for people. We need interdependence because we can’t do this all alone. We need that sense of community that has all but been demolished. It’s good that you aren’t blaming others for your problems, but also, society could be more helpful/beneficial to you instead of kicking you to the curb instead of making everything seem hopeless. It could provide you the tools to climb out instead of leaving you in the well.
All this to say, is that please don’t be ashamed to ask for help. None of us would’ve gotten this far without help from others.