It was made for me! This is my bandwidth!

Around 2010-ish someone made a supercut of all the times in thriller cinema the phone service disconnected, since writers still felt the need to close the circle.

So I got the idea for a mystery / slasher / thriller called Cell Plan based on the family cell provider plans at the time, where groups were discounted more based on the size of the group.

A group of teens / young adults get a giant group cell plan right before their vacation out at Camp Scream. It’s a great plan with great connectivity, and everyone can even see where everyone else’s phone is on their GPS / Map service.

Moreover, the cell service never fails throughout the story, even in places that it shouldn’t work (no explanation, nothing supernatural, just that communication blackouts are not part of this story). People might even think it’s bizarre when they’re way out in Whispering Lake or down in the Bloody Mines, in places where service normally cuts out.

And then throw bunches of cell phone tropes that elevate the suspense: The first victim’s phone is found before her body is. One couple who sneaked off together get split up but take each other’s phones. Someone forgets their phone back at the cabin, which is then grabbed by the killer (who then uses it to get close to a victim). The killer is holding someone’s phone and stalking a running teen while another one sees them on the map and is giving directions.

Eventually, they’ll do all the open-circle things: Call the police (they’ll show up an hour or two later), call family, maybe even get help from an expert to get the power on again.

PS: If anyone is actually connected to a studio or cinema production team or whatever and wants to turn this notion into a script, do so with my blessing. It’s just an idea, and I don’t like IP anyway.

that’s because wlan cables are laid underground

The wifi naturally accumulates in underground spots.

Or was that radon? Always get those confused.

I’m so fucking glad this meme was censored, since we all know it’s illegal to swear on the Internet. It’s even better that the attempt was so shitty that it did absolutely nothing to hide the word and only helped to bring attention to it instead. Fantastic work.

They found the WiFi mine.

Honestly that would scare the shit outta me. Why in a cave? Is someone luring me in?

That’s an SCP, but I̴ ̴d̶o̵n̷’̶t̶ ̴r̷e̸m̷e̵m̴b̷e̸r̷ w̸̲̮̃h̴̡̛̲͎̙͌̚i̸͚̗̮̍́͆̄̂̆̅̈́͝ç̴̡̧̣̺͓͍̤̙̜̍̅͋̾̃̑h̷̗̝̳̻̙̓͊ ̴̮̭̥̩̱̭͍̥͆̂͗͒̒̓̂̒͝ͅǫ̸̹̯̳̞̫̫̟̲͍̿̊̔̏͝n̶͇̥̜̫̝͐e G̴̡̢̛̘̺͉̜͔̘̺̹̳̭̖̩̥̟̼̿̌̋̈́͊̈́é̶̡̨̥̪͎͉̙̪̮͈̜̯̭̭͕̞̰͔̮̂̏̀̂͑͛͌̈̉̌̾̈́͒́̎̓̀̈̈́̈́̈͑͗̽̍́́̇͗͊̐͘͘̚͝͝͝͝t̸̢̡̢̨̨̛̛̘̺͖̩̪̬͕̮͔̪̞͎̠̲̙̹̜̤̣͖̻͎̘̺̭̘̬͈̭̝̩͔̬̖̩͖̝̣̻̗̹̗͌̂̂̑̓̒̊͑̏̄̊͂̊̾̌́́͗̀̈́͒̊͐͒́̉͛͋̈̃̉͋̈́̕͘͠ͅ ̵͉͕͓̣̋͋́̆̂͐͛̎̍̓͂̈́́͊̓͐̈́͝͝͝͝ơ̵̢̧̢̢͔̳̲̖̪̮͕̗͉̯̤̳̲̱͖͔̞̫͙͉͉̻̦͓̝̞̓̓́̌͌̊̽̀͆̏̑̂̆͊̓͑̈̂̎̆́̾̏́̎͌̈̚͘͘͘͝ͅͅư̴͎͉͍̰̭͖̱͓͊͒̎̀̐̈́̋̓̔̅̓̓͛́̂͊̓̌̊̓̀̀̈́͆̎̄̊̽̊̿͐̇̄̏̆̿̚͘͘͠͠͠t̶̨̡̧̡̧̛̤͉̩̬̬̭̦̣̭͙̹͙̩̭̫̱͖͉̜̭̦͙͖̫̪̜̪̫̙͈̪̠̤̗̫̰͌̇͋̈͊̀̄̉̾̉̿̒̈́̾̔͊̔̂̾̒͛̀̍̃̔͆́̀̍̾̈́́̊͆̇̈̈́́͋͋̅͘̚̚̚͠͝͝ͅ ̴̢̨̢̧̛̛̦̫̞̱̪͍̗͖̝͕͖̗̟͔̫͖͎͎̪͕̠̘̖̩̻̩̜͇̩̃͗̀̌̾͆̐̍͊͐͋̀̓̒̒̅̈̆͛̾̾͂̅̌̇̈̃͑̓̏̓͌̋͑̕̕͘͜͜͠ơ̵͈͙̖̜̮̗̬̟̭̞̙͚͓͖͎͙͕̣͍̣͉̱̩̝̗͙̝̫̐̀̔̉̏̈́͂͆͛͂̃͆̄̀̇̈́̍͒̓́̈́̏̿͗̀̓̏͆̑̿̋̅̑͒̈̾̇̎́́̄̀͆̚͠͝f̴̨͍͈͎̲̬̺̯͈̰̰̬̟̮̥̘̱̙̱̺̯̤̿ͅͅ ̵̡̝̦̲̟͇̙̙̎̋̋͛̉͗̐͌̀̇̄̈̿̈̈̒̄̓̌̄̒̒̓̐̌̍̓̓͗̎̏̓̚͝͝t̴̡̨̢̛͕̦͍̹̹͚̣͈̘̬̹̬͕͇̝̗̱͇͍͉̟̘̆̆͗̈́̽̓̌̒͗̈́̈́͐̏̀̐̀̏̈́̊̃̓́͋̌̕͜͝ͅͅḩ̶̭̦͙͓͂̃͠e̸̢̠̥̦̹̝̮̦̬̠̤͎̠͋̌̿͆͂̎̂̎̽̎̈́̋̈͑̅̈́͊̆̀̄̏̾̓̀͛͛̃͛̆̆̏̇̑̒̀̔̀̏̂̽̅͘̕̕͜͠͝͝͝ṟ̶̨̧͈̹̬̻̮̪̭̫͈̼̟̯̰̼̙͕̳̪̩̣̩̳̯̲͍̘̓͋͐̓̒̆̍̈́̃̓͐͗̀̈́̈̎̀͛̔͒̚͜͝͠͠͝ę̵̢̢̡̝̘̯̰͙̘͉̥̖͔̬̳͙̤̙̟̼̝̰̣̱͙̠̹̭̗̼̘̥̱̖̪̠̹̜̗̫̟̰̮̙̌̌̑̆̊͌͊̌̐̚ͅ

They got to mine the wifi out of somewhere, don’t they?

The caller is inside the house with you.

Something something Plato’s cave

Secret WiFi 8 underground lab

opens Google maps

Shit

Is this loss

Shit